Those bullies of mine….And my story in dealing with’em

As most of the kids my parents sent me to a public school, it was pretty exciting for me at the beginning to learn new stuffs about different subjects and meet new people…  yeah new people…  

I remember my years at the middle school where I was the most fat and the tallest girl of my class! yeah I was that BIG …

One of the greatest things that made me a target for those kids was being that BIG for them and everyone was like: LOSE WEIGHT FAT COW!! I have to admit that in the past it hurt me a lot to hear something similar from those I spent eight hours per a day with, and the most hurtful thing was when we were having a team work or a sport activity most of them avoided me…. 

I kept trying to interact with them at first but I failed and I’m not ashamed to say that! so all I did was ignoring them as much as I could, and isolate myself from them till I reached a point where I couldn’t speak to anyone of them!

An other situation where I got bullied was a few years ago, I’ve been attacked by three girls who wanted to take my seat place at the class, I didn’t want to leave my seat for them! who would do that? well and another confusing question how can the three ones of them sit at the same place?? !!!! one of them tried to flip the chair I was sitting at and the other started to curse me and insult me with some vulgar words I never heard someone saying in my whole life!!! I wanted to speak to the teacher but they ran to her before me and told her other stuffs! even I, I was so surprised!! I can’t forget that day ever!! I kept crying, just like kids do, and I went back home and reported everything to my elder brother! the next day we went to the school’s principal and reported everything to him, he was like OK I will deal with IT !! just relax! AND I SWEAR THAT HE NEVER DID !!! 🙂 I didn’t feel like I wanted to go back to school because I felt like I was the joke of the class! but eventually, I had to go back to school!! So I decided to avoid them, I took a chair, a table and put it on the back of the class, and I asked a girl I knew she was good to join me at my table …. I could have revenged and acted the same way as they acted, and attack people as the same way they attacked me, but I choose to do it the hard way! I was teasing them!! 🙂 how? too simply I was the first of my class for each trimester and the one that gets the best grades in EVERY subject! they went crazy for that! I have to admit that ignoring them was a great thing I did for a while, but later in life I figured out that No man is an island! or that’s why my English teacher kept trying to make me understand it! at some point they were right!! I had to lose weight! so I went through a diet! 🙂 So yeah I went from that pic on the left to the one in the right!!!

Eventually, I figured out that moving on is a bless! So I had to forgive them deep down in myself, without letting them know I did, I didn’t forgave them because they apologized (they never did actually), or because someone told me to! I forgave them because I needed that so I can move on with my life, and see things differently! but the most thing that made me upset and mad! was the fact that they were bullying others…..! and NO ONE was acting about it! even the teachers! I may haven’t reacted wildly when they bullied me, but when they did to that nice redhead girl who was sitting next to me I got upset! It was the first time I ever had to face them! I went to those girls and told them to stop the crap they were doing! because it’s no longer valid! they actually look so stupid, it didn’t make them look any special or different! it was just making them looking worse a day after another!!! when I mentioned how stupid they look I think it was a kind of a punch on the face to them to wake up!! and realize what they were doing!

After that day, I felt like I grew up some fearless attitude inside of me! I wasn’t scared nor worried to tell anyone the truth in their face, and give my opinion fearlessly !

I have to admit that without those bullies I wouldn’t be where I am now! I grew up slowly, a step by step to become fearless! and more confident than I was in the past! Thanks to them I was getting the best grades! thanks to them I developed myself optimism!

My message here is: be who you are, never hurt or bully others, it can harm a lot of people lives, don’t take it as a joke, because this joke can grow up to be something serious and lead others to harm themselves in any possible way just to get rid of that pain they think is real! be friendly, be nice, be what you want to be without crossing your limits! and the world will be just FINE …. 

And for those whom are getting bullied, report it, if it’s not working, ignore them, if it’s not working then face them, make them stop that thing they’re doing! don’t behave inappropriately ! forgive them, and move on with your life ! do it for yourself, not for them! I know it’s hard, I’ve been there, and got out safely, as I did, I’m sure you’re strong enough to do as well! I believe in you! focus on positive things, life is beautiful, I know they make it look like it’s the worst place to be at, but trust me, it’s not! we’ve got so much to give! so much to live for, you can’t imagine the opportunities that are waiting for you to take them! never lose hope! go after your dreams and achieve them! don’t tie your life to people nor to objects because they will fade, tie it to a sacred goal and achieve it! that will be the time when you will reach happiness! 

Much love, Ikram ❤

My Music Playlist

ikramais’s playlist – music playlist.

Some songs that I really enjoy, on my top twenty list! 

I hope you will enjoy them as well, I have to admit that music keeps me going everyday, music makes a huge part of my life!
it’s so inspiring, relaxing, and it makes my mind live in another world for a few minutes! which is such a great thing we must do usually!

This playlist is the one I open when I feel like I’m not in the mood or I’m having a low self-esteem, you know it’s so great to define who your favorite artists are, believe in them, in what they say and swallow the inspiration from their music, rise yourself up and kick yourself to a far limit where you can achieve what you want to achieve, music can help you to do all of that, as it did to me, I’m certain that it will do that to you…

I hope you will enjoy listening to my simple playlist…

Much Love… ❤ Ikram

Facing a hard challenge

I’m posting this poll just to view the mentality of my blog viewers 🙂 I’d be very glad if you voted
Much love ❤

The strongest girl I’ve ever met !!!!

Dear readers, as many of you know me that I’m not that kind of popular girl who has a ton girlfriend in her group, I was sitting in the university’s library as I met this mysterious girl who was reading quietly let’s call her Sia, so I decided to ask Sia about something I couldn’t understand in the book I was reading, and she started to explain to me that thing in small details, I was like waw are you at the first year as well? and she laughed and told me no I’m not, I’m actually and the second and I was like wow she has a great memory, (when someone remembers what they studied the past year it means that they were devoted to that work), so we kept on the conversation going and we spoke about a lot of stuffs in less than one hour, I don’t find a lot of people whom I feel relieved to speak to these days… the library time was off, so we had to say goodbye to each other and leave…

I didn’t even give her my number, nor my email, nothing, I looked for her a couple of times in the library, I’ve gotta admit that she had an impact on me, I wanted to get to know more about this Sia…after a few weeks she showed up near my class with a huge bag on her hands, and then she was walking toward me, and I was so happy to see her, we kept on chatting for a few minutes and than she gave me that bag telling me it was for me, and I was like what’s on it? she said all my revision resumes, copybooks, notebooks, and exam questions, I was like WHAT are you serious? seriously nobody brings you the key of how they got good grades and become the first of their classes, I was really surprised because people don’t give their stuffs usually, so I took them and I was so happy, and thanked her she told me I know you’re serious about this whole thing, you deserve these, good luck, and then she left again hurrying ….

I didn’t see her for a long time…Finally, she decided to appear the past week, and I asked her about the reason why that she was skipping lots of university courses, well she kind of ignored the question at first, but then I kept asking and insisting to know, I did not believe what she told me, she was having two jobs one in the morning and the other one after 4 pm, and then I saw tears on her eyes, I told her it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it I understand we all need money for certain stuffs, and you’re working and chose a decent way to get it… and then she replied no it’s fine I’ll tell you: and as she was telling me her hands were shaking, she said my parents got a divorced one I was 3 months, I was like okay lot of parents get a divorce, then she replied : yeah but I never met my parents, they threw me to my uncles, and each one of them left in its way, and as she was saying that she kept crying, I have to admit that she shook all my emotions and I cried with her, she said that her staying on her uncle’s house is paid with that money she earns, she broke my heart after hearing that, and adding to all that work she said that she was making cookies and selling them to the cookies stores, with a cheap sum, it’s so unfair, for a twenty one years old university girl to have all this suffering to study, I was wondering whom are we supposed to blame?? is it the Algerian system that is not offering enough money for these kids? or her parents who left her when she was three months old, or must we put the blame on that mean uncle that is swallowing this little girl’s energy, money and time….

As I was holding her hand and feeling so speechless, I told her hang in there girl because you’re very strong, don’t let all this hold you  back from where you are and who you became, and her eyes were focused on mines as she was motivated, she said no one would understand what I’m feeling unless they lived the same thing, I can’t deny that I agreed with her when she said that, but I replied, I do understand, I know what it feels like to not have love at all in your life, and be the one who has to live with the missing of intimacy, well I don’t literally know that but I had times where I felt hated, and no where was beside me, I just kept telling her to focus on her schoolwork and leave the morning work to attend her courses and explain this to her uncle, and she was listening carefully I gave her a few methods how she can satisfy him with a small amount for now, honestly her story is what I watch on movies, I could never believe that these materialist category can exist in a cultivated society as ours, well after all I don’t think they are, not all but some, I just wished that there was a way I can take Sia home with me, because a gentle and a nice person and a hard working one as her doesn’t deserve to have a life like this…..

Sia opened my eyes to see that living, and working hard is much much more than taking good grades at school, and home cooking, cleaning …. After the last time we met, she had an influence on me, though she was crying and feeling down about her situation but after a few minutes she wiped all her tears and started to smile and to make jokes like nothing of this is real,  she’s so strong, she’s strong to defeat all of this by herself and never go ask money from anyone, and does it in a very decent way, she’s so strong to keep all her grades high for the past years, she’s so strong to  live in this torturing world without being afraid, she doesn’t complain, she doesn’t get tired, but she has her moments like anyone of us do everytime things run out of control….for me being fearless is being Sia, being this strong great girl whom is unstoppable…

I learnt a lot from this young lady, she opened my eyes to a lot of stuffs I couldn’t see….I’m so happy that I’ve met her.

I think we really really really must stop complaining about how bad our lives are, and start cherishing the blessings we have around us and count them one by one and be thankful for every small one of them….it’s the best way to find what we’re looking for, to be who we are, to be strong, to be able to combat with any thing no matter what it could be! As long as we’re here we have to make a trace that we were really here.